Andy has a daughter he hasn’t seen in years. She is going to be 16 in October. When we took the kids to the MOA for Hugh’s b-day we were waiting for the kids to get off a ride and we were wondering if Andy would recognize her if she walked by. (she lives down by the MOA) There really isn’t a day that goes by that Andy doesn’t think about her or wonder how she is doing. He has her school picture in his wallet and proudly states he has 3 kids. His side is that he did try to see her. Whenever there was a court date the mom wouldn’t show up for one reason or another and when he was to arrange to see her, the mom would have her home # disconnected. He also listened to advise from everyone else but his own heart. so with that being said Andy gave up. It sounds like Andy’s ex wife really didn’t want much to do with it either since she never went to go visit Ashley but he would take Hugh. At the time her excuse was she was tired and pregnant. I am sorry that is lame. I am marrying a man who has 3 kids and one isn’t legally his even. (Andy is the only father that Hugh has known even though he isn’t biologically his and the bio dad wouldn’t give him up for adoption)
So anyway… the other night I was on myspace searching for Ashley… found her! I sent her a message and waited. She added us to her friends so we knew it was her. It did come as a shock to her, a dad she doesn’t know contacting her. Here is why we did… more me. I know what it’s like to not know who your dad and family is. When I was her age I was so curious but my mom wouldn’t let find that family. If there wouldn’t have been the resources there are now I know I would have. I had always felt that there was a piece of me missing until I met my bio side when I was 19. Now I have 2 families that I love and I am blessed with 2 dads! Now I am not looking for a happily ever after with Ashley. But I want her to know her dad, know that man that I have come to love. From what I have seen from photos on her Myspace she is all goth, dark or colored hair and wild clothes. She is very artsy like Andy which is way cool. It doesn’t bother me at all. Can’t change a person and all she is doing is expressing herself which at that age if I could have had the fun colors in my hair and worn what I wanted I would have. Andy is the one that sounds like was sorta like that especially when he went to the art college in New York.
So now it’s baby steps… I told Andy he has some damage control with her and he needs to email her. He needs to be upfront and honest. He isn’t 25 or 30 anymore they need to look forward not behind. So with all this being said… I am going to be a stepmom to a 15 year old! That is scary for me to comprehend but I think totally worth it. I just hope she can accept us the way we are and we do have a relationship with her.










